EN 
FR 
Communication is to relationship what breath is to life
- Virginia Satir
Seek to understand, then be understood
- Stephen R. Covey
Effective communication is the precursor of harmony
- Fal A. Diabaté
As social beings, we thrive in life by building relationships with other living creatures. Virginia Satir's quote encapsulates this perfectly: communication is to relationships what breath is to life. It is arguably the one of the most important skills in life. But what exactly is communication?
Communication involves the delivery, reception and understanding of messages for a specific purpose. There are five types of communications; reading, writing, speaking, listening and non-verbal. We all communicate with friends, family members, business partners, colleagues and strangers in one or a combination of these forms interaction.
When we read alone or for an audience, we communicate with ourselves or with others. Reading is a type of communication we all learn at an early age. However, effective reading is a skill most people seek to master. In a classroom or a business meeting, an effective reader is someone whose reading speed is between 200 to 300 words per minute (WPM), retains about 80% of the content read, and can recall it with confidence. Effective readers become better readers with higher reading comprehension.
To achieve this, you need to read a lot to increase your vocabulary. The more you read, the more words you acquire, and the more words you acquire, the faster reader you become. Concentration and reading speed are important to avoid spacing out and regression (i.e., rereading previous sentences). You can improve your retention by taking notes in your own words and reviewing these summarized notes of all paragraphs. You can recall what you read using mnemonics or spaced repetitions techniques, such as the Leitner system.
Whether you are writing memos, formal emails, reports, or proposals, clarity of thought is a prerequisite for writing effectively. Clarity of thought should translate into clarity in your writing. This means writing with the audience in mind, ensuring the purpose of your writing is easily understood, and making the content concise and to the point. Depending on the circumstances of your writing, you should address the following questions for your readers: who, why, what, when, and the next steps.
If the reader doesn’t know you, include a brief introduction. Clearly articulate the purpose of your writing, what you are asking for, the level of urgency, and the next steps. For proposals and business letters, it’s important to capture the reader’s attention by clearly stating why they should read your proposal. Engage the reader’s interest in your topic, motivate them to be receptive to your writing with positive intent, state the impact of your request, and include a call to action. Always review your writing multiple times before publishing it.
Speaking is one of the most common types of communication used to convey ideas. According to Brian Tracy, a communication coach, words account for 7% of a message to an audience, the speed and tone of voice account for 38%, and body language constitutes 55%. This statistic highlights the strong correlation between emotions expressed through gestures, posture, body language, and tone of voice, and the receptivity of a message.
Audiences can be classified into four types:
1. Relators: People who want to connect with your message.
2. Analyzers: People who seek accuracy and facts.
3. People who want the speaker to get straight to the point.
4. Socializers: Expressive individuals.
A speaker should always know the type of audience he’s engaging. Regardless of the audience type, an effective communicator needs to deliver her message with sincerity, conciseness, clarity, and respect. Sentences should be short and meaningful, avoiding long-windedness which can create confusion and give a perception of insecurity. To avoid long-winded sentences, skip preambles, qualifications, unnecessary explanations, and backstories. Instead, deliver the bottom line or the core message. After delivering your message, pause to give your audience a chance to respond and for you to listen.
An effective communicator should also be an effective listener. Effective listening provides balance in dialogues and can foster humility and empathy for your audience. This is reflected in Stephen Covey’s quote, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” When listening, it’s important not to be disengaged or distracted by forward-looking thoughts or other interruptions. Instead, an effective listener is active, present, patient, and waits his turn to paraphrase the speaker's message and ask open-ended questions to seek understanding.
Personal insecurity, control issues, self-centeredness, impatience, or arrogance can sometimes prevent people from listening deeply. Empathetic listening can help overcome these issues and make you an active listener. As Stephen Covey explains in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, “The essence of empathetic listening is not that you agree with someone; it is that you fully, deeply understand that person emotionally as well as intellectually.”
As mentioned earlier, non-verbal communication, such as body language, constitutes about 55% of the message. An effective non-verbal listener uses not only their ears and eyes but also their heart. When genuine, the non-verbal listener can better understand the speaker and potentially avoid miscommunications and unnecessary conflicts.
Effective communication is the precursor to harmony. To achieve this state, you need to organize your thoughts—having a clear beginning, middle, and end of your message. Keep it sincere, clear, and concise. Maintain a logical flow to help the audience follow and remember your points. Use effective and appropriate pauses, and avoid confidence reducers like fillers (e.g., “you know,” “ah,” “well”) and negative body language such as inappropriate eye contact or hesitations in tone. Instead, state your truth with respect, clarity, conciseness, and confidence.
Until we meet again, keep communicating effectively.
Fal Diabaté
Managing Partner, Barra Advisory Group